Boys and girls playing see-how-fast-you-can-eat-an-orange game. Messy. Involves coughing and choking noises.

Cats with static. Minus 10 degrees.

Q: Bowel Transplants. Why don’t they do bowel transplants?
A: I don’t know. Maybe they can’t be arsed.

Re-runs of Peep Show.

The Blue Aeroplanes: Jacket Hangs

The Kinks: Dead End Street

The distance by road to south east France

Icicles: A Risk Assessment

Tom’s long johns

Stepdad: ‘A bloody wizard Christmas’

Q ‘Are you … spinning plates?’
A ‘Yeah. It’s the sort of thing I like to do on Boxing Day.’

Listening to Leadbelly